I haven't written much about my job search, partly because there hasn't been much to say, and partly because although I blog mostly anonymously, I'm still a little worried about any possible professional impact. Also, I try to keep the whining to a minimum. I do, and get, enough of that in real life.
Today, I'm going to throw caution to the winds and try to work this problem out somewhere other than in my head.
Except for my deliberate and extended maternity leave, I think this is the longest I have ever been unemployed. Somedays it's extremely discouraging, and other days I really enjoy the opportunity to be here when the boys get home, work through their homework and take them to practices and appointments as need be. There are a few things that have come up with the boys that I just wouldn't have been able to handle as effectively had I been working full time. I wish that I could find a way to do this and still be bringing in money.
I've been sending out resumes regularly, and even getting a few interviews. What's been so different this time around is that even the interviews that go well haven't resulted in offers. When you are sitting there aceing the interview questions it's easy to forget that there were a huge number of other applicants and one of them is bound to have more experience, or say something that hits the interviewer in exactly the right way. I'm also starting to wonder if my age is becoming the factor that motherhood became in my last job search. Maybe they are actually looking for someone with less experience that they don't have to pay as much.
I'm starting to wake up to the fact that shifting careers at this point may not only sound good to me right now, it may become a necessity.
Some kind of course correction was on my mind when I was still employed. After five years of chasing after children with some consulting mixed in, day after day of heads-down-at-my-desk work wasn't really sitting right with me. I need to be up and about, collaborating with other people. Part of the reason I was so anxious to return to work was that I missed being part of a team. What I found when I got there was just as isolating as being at home for five years.
I recognize that complaint is more about me than the work or the workplace. We're all cut out for different things and the things we are cut out for sometimes evolve.
So the big question now is how to change direction and what direction to take. If I knew the answer to that, I'd probably have a job by now. Or at least a plan.